The Customer Is Always Wrong

Having worked in retail for almost five years now, I've learned one incredibly valuable lesson: The customer, is almost always wrong.

I don't care what any team of customer service big-wigs say, the average customer is not only wrong, they are staggeringly wrong. They're so wrong, they make Joseph Fritzl's actions seem right. They are a lost, confused, uneducated bunch of narrow minded dimwits who have no concept of the meaning of 'right'.

Customers feel the need to concrete some sense of self worth, be it by lecturing the shop assistant in things they really know nothing about, or the determination to save money, even if they have no idea what it is they're buying. They're a breed of moronic drones, compelled to purchase things they really don't need, for reasons they don't understand. And yet they insist they know more about it than the retailer, because y'know, it's not as though the shop assistant trying to help them knows what they're talking about.

There are mothers who think they know best, and buy games like Bioshock for their six year old kids, returning them promptly when said child has developed a series of horrific nightmares. Retailer's fault. There are men who against all advice bought Damnation then complained because it was shite. Retailer's fault. About a week ago I had a guy come up to me, and complain that he'd already got to disc two of Mass Effect 2. He complained, as though I could offer him some sort of compensation because he'd not bothered to explore the game.

As far as I'm concerned, consumer rights can kiss my grotesquely scarred scrotum. The proles that I have to deal with every day are walking, mouth-breathing proof that the consumer is most certainly not always right. In fact, considering the amount of un-warranted returns and refunds, they're barely customers.