Pot-HATE-oes

I have just had beef and chips for tea. I dislike chips immensely, in fact I fucking LOATHE them.

I hate potatoes in general. Fucking boring potatoes. I wish potatoes would fuck off. Those poor sods who lived through the Irish potato famine? Lucky lucky bastards. Potatoes seem to make up about 98% of British cuisine, and it annoys me to no end. I fail to understand why what appears to be LITERALLY everybody likes potatoes.

Potatoes are the most uninteresting food-stuff I've ever encountered. Their bland taste is the most uninspiring flavour I can think of, and the dreadfully not-quite-solid texture goes right through me. The idea that this is the key factor to most Briton's staple diet make me cringe, and knowing that I'm almost definitely the only person in England who hates the stupid things annoys me further.

And yeah I know what you're thinking 'ooh look at Mr BA Japanese with honours, speaks forren and now he thinks he's better than me with his rice cooker and his dried pasta'. Well I fucking do, so fuck off and take your potatoes with you.

Fuck off, potatoes.